Diverticulitis flare up started this morning.
I swear...you just can't make this stuff up.
↧
CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF FLOODS AND LOCUSTS...
↧
Article 0
Still feeling poorly, but I'm here, Dearies. Please don't fret or worry...all will be well.
Eventually.
↧
↧
Article 1
↧
DEAR FRIENDS
Tomorrow I will start dialysis.
As much as I would love to tell you that I am calm, prepared, and light hearted...the truth is that I'm terrified.
I'm not afraid of the pain or the inconvenience or the side effects or the risks or the...I don't even know. I'm terrified of the fact that this is just not the path I wanted to take.
But, if nothing else, I am learning that sometimes the unexpected is actually...wonderful. And that the unexpected takes us places and gives us things that we didn't even know we needed.
So I need you to bear with me for a minute, Dearies. I might not be here as often as I would like the next few days. I need to get my head around this and fall into a routine before I will be able to regale you with Tales From the Dialysis Unit.
Your cards and gifts and emails and comments and calls and visits and love and support are, as always, completely overwhelming. I really don't know how I got to be so lucky to find you. This thing of ours is, and has been, one of the greatest blessings of my life.
Take good care, do something fun, get those needles flying, and come tell me all about it.
With love,
Coni
The Spinster Stitcher
↧
D-DAY
This woman is pregnant.
She is running in a race.
She won the race.
While pregnant.
And while wearing a Wonder Woman sports bra and flowers in her hair.
Really, Alysia? Really? You manage to do that and still look completely fabulous, and I can't get it together enough to GO SIT IN A FREAKIN CHAIR. Girlfriend, you just gave me the kick in the heiney I needed to pull up my socks, quit my fretting, and get the heck on with it. This sitting around catastrophizing is just for the damn birds. So, I'm a kidney patient. So, I have to start dialysis. I'm fifty-one years old and have been through far worse and done it all with far less.
Enough.
Thank you, dear friends, for cooing gently and stroking my fevered brow while patting my back and propping me up. I confess that the feeling if sinking into that particular warm blanket has been lovely, but...
I. Got. This.
Now let's get on with our Fabulous Fridays and see what trouble we can get into. Rumor has it that I am going to spend this Christmas holiday planning my stitchy rotation for next year. Visions of Miras and Red Velvet Cake are dancing in my head! Maybe a new journal or WIP tracker too. And threads! And LJP's! And lots and lots of laughs and love with all of you and my stitchy guild sisters!
Woo to the Hoo, people! Woo to the Hoo!
↧
↧
I'VE BEEN HERE TEN MINUTES AND THEY'RE GIVING ME GIFTS ALREADY
↧
REMIND ME TO TELL YOU A STORY....
About the time I went for my first dialysis treatment and used a picture of a pregnant woman wearing a Wonder Woman top for inspiration and when I got there and got in my chair a pregnant woman with a Wonder Woman top was my tech.
I swear, you can't make this stuff up.
Dearies, I am in the Happy Chair today with Christmas movies and my stitching. I feel a bit like I've been in a car crash, but I suppose that's to be expected for a bit. I'm going to finish my damn good and get on with it.
Love and thanks to all...hope your Saturday is swell!
↧
CHRISTMAS EVE 2017
Dear Friends,
What a year it's been. For some, full of heartache and tears. For others, happiness and laughter. My own year has been full of blessings and love. Today is Christmas Eve, but my gifts came all year long from a community of like-minded souls determined to make this a better place by just being kind.
My Christmas wish is that you will all know the peace and love that you so generously gave me, and that your heart is filled with profound joy.
With much much love,
Coni
The Spinster Stitcher
↧
OEY
Buzzy and I got in a bar fight. He's hooked up to the Jiffy Lube at the moment and I am getting ready to close my eyes for round three. We're a bit worse for wear kids, but my Jersey Boy will be home at eight tomorrow morning, so...it's all good.
No stitching to report. I just haven't felt well enough to do so. I am determined to get into that cube room studio and get a basket together, so stay tuned! I am thinking that I might join in the Frosty Forest SAL...my very first!
OK, time to close my eyes and go to my happy place for a bit...back to Chez Spinster with snow softly falling down, the fireplace warm and toasty, Stewey on the ottoman, Jersey Boy in the kitchen making waffles, and all of you hanging out laughing and stitching.
Happy Futzingday! Do something fun and come tell me all about it!
↧
↧
IN WHICH BUZZY MISBEHAVES AND GETS SENT TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE
Ugh.
My first dialysis session was a piece of cake...low and slow and about two and a half hours. I chattered like a circus monkey but got the lay of the land a bit and came home with two small booboos.
The second session was going just fine until I bent my arm (to see if I could stitch), infiltrated, and all hell broke loose. Three techs and what felt like minor surgery later and I came home with instructions to ice the arm, six booboos and enough tape to circle the globe.
Today? I thought I was doing fine, but after an hour the nurse pulled the plug. Literally.
So I'm home with Buzzy under an ice pack and an appointment at 8am Friday morning to have him checked at the access center and then we'll try again with the dialysis on Friday afternoon.
Greusome, I tell ya. Just freakin greusome. Between the eyeball and a now very swollen and black and blue arm, I look like a character in a Stephen King novel.
Dialysis. Sucks.
↧
HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY
Jersey Boy is home safe and sound and I am in the Happy Chair with a new project. This is Forest Snowfall from Country Cottage Needleworks and I am hoping to start it soon.
Buzzy is still very unhappy and will see the doctors tomorrow morning at 7:25. Then, if all is well dialysis will take place again in the afternoon.
That's the report for the day, Dearies. I hope that your corner of the world is warm and safe and dry and completely swell. Come tell me all about it!
↧
CHANGE OF VIEW
Today's post is brought to you from the cozy confines of the big girl sleigh bed at CS2. Buzzy and I had surgery this morning and are now home recovering for a bit before heading to dialysis later this afternoon. Turns out he had a bit of a blockage that was causing a fuss, as well as a few errant branches, so some angioplasty, a stent, and a couple of coils laters and we're all set.
(Who knew the little guy was so into accessories?!)
Rich is clattering away at the dining room table on his laptop contraption and I have decided to just be a patient today. No need to solve world peace or recreate the wheel. Just snoozing, happy thoughts, and spaghetti for a late lunch before heading out into the tundra again.
I'm not crazy about the third shift time slot, but as time goes on and space opens up I should be anle to go on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays in the morning so that I can enjoy my afternoons and evenings with my Jersey Boy. It's all about routine, kids. It's all about routine.
My stitching routine has gotten so out of kilter it's not even funny, but I am trying to breathe and reboot and remember that this is just a temporary diversion...not the end of a career. I have a head like a rock, so the realization that I cannot stitch during my Jiffy Lubes is troublesome, but I need to just chill out and let it come. Maybe eventually I will get to the point where a lap stand will work. Now, though, I need to enjoy playing on the ipad thingie and just keep the damn arm still.
So that's it for a blistery Friday, my Dearies. All is well...all is well.
Please continue to tell me all about your little corners of the world. I hope that your needles are flying, your hearts are full, and that the weekend is exactly everything you want it to be!
↧
IN WHICH WE DISCOVER THE JOY OF THE GREATEST SOCKS EVER MADE
These are fuzzy socks from the JoAnns. I think they were about three bucks for a pack of two pair, and all I know is that they are changing my life. They are warm and fuzzy and stupid stupid soft, and the designs are whimsical and making me happy.
I am determined to stitch today, but I need to get my wits about me. Last night's dialysis session was rather drama-filled because I clotted and then decided to lose my blood pressure. Let me tell you, kids, if you ever want to see a trauma team in action, let your blood pressure drop to 60/40. I've never had that experience before, and I'm not sure I ever want to have it again, but the team was well-prepared and I lived to tell the tale. Just a little worse for wear today about the head and arm, but nothing a Tylenol and a few ice packs won't remedy, I'm sure.
Today is bitterly cold and snowy outside, so the Jersey Boy and I are hunkered down with sports on the TeeVee and a pot roast for dinner. I had hoped to be with my stitchy sisters today, but alas, methinks it will be the Happy Chair and the big girl sleigh bed until tomorrow morning when I venture out into the tundra for the next adventure.
Thank you, as always, for your notes and love and support and encouragement. Please forgive my negligence in responding to you properly....I am fretting over the lapse of etiquette but know that you will all understand.
I hope that your very own Saturday is warm and safe and dry, Dearies. Let's see what fun we can get into and then come tell each other all about it!
↧
↧
DRAMA QUEEN
I'm fine, but Buzzy has been a screaming mimi and had to be put in time out with a big fat Valium. We arrived at the dialysis center at 7:15 his morning and he was either grumpy from the cold and being woken up at the crack of dawn, or he's still sore and puffy from surgery.
![]()
So that's the report for now. I'll leave you with a little glimpse of my view today. Only three more hours to go!
![]()
Either way it made for a stupidly dramatic morning again.
Damn Buzzy.
I swear, all this fuss is Stewey Little coming back to haunt me for being such a bad Mo-ther. Given the similarities in personalities between the two, I won't be at all surprised if we get home and Buzzy decides to pee on the ottoman.
A new stitchy start last night! I decided to play along with all of you stitching Forest Snowfall by Little House Needleworks. I think I'm supposed to hashtag or something, but this is me we're talking about, Kids, and I haven't a clue.
Not much progress, but progress nonetheless:
↧
HAPPY NEW YEAR, DEAR FRIENDS...DEAR FAMILY
↧
DEAR ANNE.
This is an email that I received from Anne. My response to her is below:
I've commented on your blog a few times as Spendsister, but reading your post today I felt a private email might be more suitable.
Coni, you need to get your shit together. Excuse my bluntness, but you are a mess and you are seemingly oblivious to the consequences. You can joke and make funny snappy comebacks but it is way past the time for you to get serious. This is your life at stake. Not a missed stitch, not a lost house, not an asshole sister - your life. Does anything else even matter? Or come close? Stop calling your port by a silly little name. It is not a silly little personality, it's a medical intervention to help save your life. It doesn't have moods or feelings, if it's hurting, something is wrong, fix it and move on with your treatments.
You know, I love your blog. I see a lot of myself in you. But right now I am upset with you because you aren't being careful enough. How on earth can you be stitching with your arm as messed up as it is? Girl, you haven't stitched in MONTHS! I mean MONTHS! Why are you insisting on doing it now with an arm all bruised and swollen? Read a damn book! You read books, right?
I think the comment someone made that perhaps you were not quite as ready to accept dialysis as you thought hit the big ol' nail on the big ol' head. I couldn't figure out why you didn't start dialysis months ago, get into it before there was more deterioration, before you couldn't get out of bed - I couldn't understand why you were so stubborn about resisting something that would actually help you (again, there's a lot of me in that sentence). Well, your blog today hit me right between the eyes.
You're still looking for someone to blame. To give you an excuse not to face dialysis. Today it was "buzzy" being "bad". It wasn't enough that you deliberately BENT YOUR ELBOW during treatment? You had to continue to irritate the hell out of it stitching last night? Before that it was your sister not making a decision. Excuse me, but isn't your life YOUR freakin' decision?
Somewhere along the way, you decided that a quick and clean transplant from a perfectly matched sibling was a hell of a lot easier than long term dialysis for the rest of your life tethering you ( literally) to a chair 3 times a week. Of course it is. If she matched. If you didn't reject it. If she was healthy enough to give up a kidney. Even with all those ifs, you decided that's what you wanted. But you didn't get what you wanted. Life's funny that way, isn't it?
So now you're doing your best to sabotage dialysis. See? It doesn't work. I can't do it. I tried. Except, as some famous guy said, Failure is not an option. At least not for you right now.
When I had stage 3B breast cancer, people kept asking me how I stayed so calm. Why aren't you freaking out? Why aren't you hysterical? Why aren't you crying? Well I did all those things. Then I said ok, that didn't help. I still have cancer. So I stopped all that, and found out what I needed to do, because I did know that this was NOT what's going to kill me.
And then (and this was the hard part) I did it. No one did it for me. I couldn't cry or whine or buy my way out of it. My parents, my siblings, my friends, my enemies, could. not. do. it. for. me. I was alone at that wall and had to get over it all by myself.
Put your big girl pants on and start climbing, Coni. You've got a long way to go. Only you know if you've got what it takes.
Good luck.
Sent from my iPad
Dear Anne.
Wow. What a note. Thank you for writing it. First, let me say Happy New Year. I confess that this hit me square in the solar plexis, and at first I was a little winded but now I've got my wits about me a bit and I'd like to respond...thoughtfully.
My blog and the "character" of The Spinster Stitcher are just that....a blog and a character. I started wrtiting it as a means to re-engage with a particular corner of the world, because I was a new stitcher and had just spent the better part of several long years inside my house battling some pretty horrific demons.
At first, the character was jusr a portly, hapless, dog-loving oaf who bumblefucked her way through a funny little life. The comments from readers were light-hearted and esoteric and about simple easy things, and I used the blog, a talking dog wearing a smoking jacket, and a cast of other goofy characters to escape into a little fantasy world.
Over the course of the last few years, though, I've ventured into unknown territory a bit by talking about (often making fun of) the big hard things going on around me. Foreclosure, financial ruin, the loss of my sister, Stewey's illness and death, and then finally, my own poor health....all big hard things that are insanely difficult, unpleasant, and challenging to be sure.
The Spinster Stitcher deals with this things with a squirting flower, big floppy shoes, and a lot of exaggeration and self-deprocation. She kind of stumbles and giggles and ends up floundering her way through this life of ours because it makes for a much better story than does that cold hard reality.
My emails are now filled with notes from friends across the world that reveal big hard things in their own lives. What started as a light-hearted attempt to be in the community has now become (in my head, anyway) a very serious responsibility. I feel compelled to issue forth with humor and wit and sarcasm and fantasy as a means of assuring myself and others that we're going to be OK and that we've got a soft place to fall in each other's company.
But, your note tells me that it's now important that you know a bit of the ugly truth. Let me first say that I'm sorry if you feel let down or frustrated with me and my response to dialysis. Here, therefore, is the real truth wih the hope that it will assure you that I am not, as you say, a mess.
From the time of diagnosis, I have been a ridiculously informed, compliant, amd determined patient. Like all kidney patients, I have managed an enormous flow chart of possible pathways that would lead to a long, healthy, productive, happy life.
The most positive outcome for me would have been a pre-emptive transplant from my sister. To that end, I spent the bette part of two years working very hard to accomplish this. I was given an intensive and long list of things to complete to get ready, and I did so. With some complaining and fuss, I will admit, but nonethess I did so and looked forward to that pathway.
My team and I made the decision to postpone dialysis as long as we did because that was the best decision medically. Period. It was never and will never be within my thought process to just ignore it or put it off because it was going to be scary or inconvenient or anything else for that matter. Dialysis was always the last and least desirable resort.
Now that it's here, I chose to blog about it by naming the fistula Buzzy and by taking what has been a scary, painful, miserable few weeks into a place where I could sprinkle a bit of glitter on it and make lemonade. The first session was overwhelming, to be sure, but the second (in which I infiltrated) was horrific. For the record...the infiltration happened because I instinctively bent my arm to get more comfortable in the chair. The subsequent fistulagram, angioplasty, and stent were probably more extreme than was necessary, but again, my team and I are approaching this with caution and the very best medical advice available.
I'm not sure if I can convince you or not, and to be honest, I don't know if I am actually required to, but I promise you that I have my big girl panties firmly in place and that I am handling this entire situation with as mich grace, dignity, courage, and intelligence that I can muster.
The Spinster Stitcher is whining about not being able to stitch or bend her arm for eighteen hours a week. She's also missing her little dog and mourning the loss of her dream house...wrenching her guts over her sister, and swooning over the entry of a man into her world. She's still cluess, but loveable...hopeful and happy...but more than anything...profoundly grateful that she has a place to exist and make a small dofference in the world.
Coni Rich is fifty-one year old end stage renal patient who is in the initial stages of dialysis. She is calm, measured, careful, and extremely capable of handling whatever comes at her. She has been through wars much bigger than this and come out of them dented but detemined. She's pretty fierce and can be a major major bitch, but she is, if nothing else, a bull-headed fighter that knows when to show up.
My wish for you, dear Anne, is that you will have a wonderful New Year. Thank you again for your note. I hope that your corner of the world is swell and that you'll continue to be part of my own little corner of it. That, is, after all, what it's all about.
With mich love,
Coni Rich
The Spinster Stitcher
↧
NEW YEAR...NEW START
The Prairie Schooler
January...Book #177
stitching on 28ct unknown linen from stash
all DMC threads
↧
↧
JUST ME AND THE CHICKENS...AGAIN
I took Rich to the South Bend International Airport and Transportation Center at 6:00 this morning for a quick trip down to Orlando for a trade show. The thingie on the car said it was minus eleven degrees. I think it's supposed to be sixty in Orlando today.
Jersey Boy didn't want to go.
Silly, silly, Jersey Boy.
My plan for the day is rather extensive. I'm going to sit in the Happy Chair and ice my arm, drink damn good, read the paper, watch all of the TeeVee, stitch, and eat.
(Grueling, I know, but I've been training for this for years, Kids, so don't try this at home.)
Life is actually pretty swell in these here parts. Buzzy is stiff and sore as a matter of natural course, and I have another day and a half of healing time before heading back for dialysis. New Years Day falling on a Monday prompted me switching to a Sunday, Wednesday, Friday rotation this week, and I think this extra day us really a blessing.
So that's it for me and the chickens. Rumor has it that they will have something to say in the very near future so stay tuned!
↧
OEY...
Hello, Dearies.
As much as I would love to tell you that my Futzingday was perfectly swell...it was not.
I awoke at 6am to text JB a hearty "Good Morning'" along with a few kissy faces, and just as I was falling back to sleep, the dialysis unit called to see if I wanted to come in early. I was supposed to go at 4:40 in the pm, but a chair opened up and off I went.
I won't gross you out with the gory details, but it was definitely not pretty, We lost my blood pressure again, I spent a good amount of time on my head, and then, just for good measure, I upchucked all over everything right there in front of God and everybody.
( Which is my very worst nightmare come true, by the way.)
It came pretty close to me getting a ride in an ambulance to the ER, but it was determined that this might very well be a touch of the flu, combined with an intolerance of dialysis. Unfortunately, kids, I am just not doing as well on it as I would have hoped between the clotting, the blood pressure drops, the arm, and now this...so keep those prayers coming that I get over the hump.
This, I am loathe to tell you, is pretty rough stuff.
But I also really need to say it again and again...I've got this. I really do. I'm not saying that I've got it with any modicum of success at this point, but I really am giving it everything I've got.
One thing I do need to do, though, is address the kidney donation situation.
Many if you have commented or emailed me asking how you can get tested to be a living donor. I pray that you are never in a position to have to say this, but is it OK for me to admit that I don't even know how to wrap my brain around that kind of love? Psychologically, I'm just not equipped to say "Cool! Thanks! Here's how you do it!" But medically, I know that it might be the only way to save my life.
So...for those of you who have asked...I am currently enrolled in the Indiana University Health Transplant program. My coordinator is Jane Kinkelaar and she can be reached at 800-382-4602. You can also visit their website at iuhealth.org to learn more about living donation. I believe that they will ask you my details as the patient, so here they are: Coni J Rich. Date of birth is 4-14-1966.
Finally, I need to share with you that my sister is still very much in the picture as a potential donor for me, but I cannot give you any more details than that. Her story is not mine to tell, but it's important to me that you not think ill of her...but rather keep her (and Bosco) in your prayers, please.
Geeze, Louise...will you look at me with all of the asking neediness already? I really don't like this feeling of being flat on my shell at the mercy of the world...but I can promise you that once I'm up again we are going to have the Mo-ther of all parties to celebrate it.
I'm picking out the color scheme now...
If you're in these here parts and are at the wrath of Old Man Winter today, please stay warm and safe and dry. I'm going to attempt a little upright and a cup of damn good, and then maybe watch the snow fall until Rich gets home tonight.
Cheers, dears!
↧
INTRODUCING THE CHICKEN SISTERS...
Hello!
![]()
I'm Josephine Fox.
And I'm Eleanor Kelly:
![]()
We've been part of this crazy spinster ride for quite a while now, and thought we'd take a moment to introduce ourselves. It looks like we might be stepping in every now and then to fill the proverbial editorial gap here on the blog now that Stewey has crossed the Rainbow Bridge, so we've been practicing our very best witty banter and reporting skills to get up to the task. So with our very best effort, we'll see what we can do to keep you all informed and entertained with all things Spinster Stitcher.
It might take us a few days to complete Orientation. After all, we have one tiny brain and no workable fingers between us (giggle giggle), so bear with us while we learn the ropes and interview a suitable administrative assistant. There's a handsome fellow here that we've ruffled our feathers at a few times, but he seems very unlikely to take on a pair of geriatric talking chickens as a new project.
(But, just a tiny bit of gossip...because that's what we chickens are known for...this fellow does seem to be quite smitten with our spinster and seems to cater to her every silly whim. The affection is definitely mutual, since she is in the habit of sitting in her Happy Chair...gazing at him adoringly.)
(It's enough to make ordinary chickens toss their nuggets, but we two are very old hopefully romantic chickens...so we don't mind at all.)
We'll write more later, but wanted to wish you all a very Happy New Year, all Glad Tidings, and Blessings to you and yours for a healthy, happy, and prosperous 2018!
With love and chicken kisses,
Josephine and Eleanor
The Chicken Sisters
↧